Why Feminine Energy Matters

Over the past 50 years, as you know, women have been told that we need to be aggressive, logical, confident, focused, self-sufficient, independent. There's that whole boss babe movement that we can do everything by ourselves. We can get shit done. And these traits are wonderful. They are beautiful traits. They help us. They've helped me get the dream home that I've wanted, the dream business that I've wanted, working for myself. They help us experience amazing accomplishments. And so, this [masculine] energy can really propel us. But it's also leaving us feeling really burnt out and alone and disconnected in relationships.

What is this, this masculine energy? Why is it affecting us? Well, we're not balanced. We're leading a lot of times in our in our romantic relationships, like we do in our businesses. We're go getters. We're take charge. And this leaves the masculine men feeling disempowered. Actually, it it's caused us to get completely out of whack for so many women who have soared to the top of their games in businesses and sports entertainment. Our energy is out of balance, and we end up attracting men who are out of balance as well. So, this is where it gets really uncomfortable for you, as it may appear to fly right in the face of what we understand of what a strong woman is. So, bear with me.

We've been told that the ultimate in female strength is independence and self-reliance, that it's important to never feel like we need a partner. However, this approach ends up becoming a barrier to the kind of relationship that we desire. Why? Because this approach is based out of fear, and fear never leads the way to our higher self. Only love can do that. But in a balanced relationship, the feminine in us, the one who wants to feel the one, the part of us who wants to lean back in, trust and be in our flow and to feel good, that part of us needs to feel safe, protected, adored, cherished, and loved.

The feminine wants to receive and allow. She doesn't want to control. She wants to feel expressive. She wants to let her hair down. She wants to feel safe. To express her emotions without being scolded or judged. Her masculine counterpart needs to feel respected and successful. The trusted guide. He wants to feel cared about. He wants to feel really gotten by her. Like she knows his heart. He needs her to be his safe place to land at the end of a competitive, hard day. He wants her to be his peace. For many of us, moving towards this dynamic in a relationship is terrifying. We are so used to controlling within a relationship or have been in relationship where our partner took advantage of our vulnerability in Reliance.

 So, how do we let go of control? How do we discover what our limiting beliefs are, our old patterns? Feminine embodiment has been the key that has really unlocked the door towards a relationship to myself. Feminine embodiment is this movement where you close your eyes. You're on the ground, mostly on your hands and knees, or just moving your body in some way. Maybe you're sitting, but it's doing what feels good. Feminine embodiment is about feeling. It's not about doing. 

But I can just tell you from my own experience of it, it's how you feel. So, I've really learned to lean back, to let the water settle, to trust, to wait, to have patience, to breathe. I think as women, that’s what we want, naturally. But we've built ourselves up to be these go getters, to be these boss babes, to do it all without asking for help. And we don't get any rewards from doing this. We don't get rewarded or more money from being burnt out and stressed. Maybe we get to say we did it, we did it all. Now we are worthy. Maybe having those certificates on the wall or having that man or knowing that you've spent your last dollar on your kids, buying them exactly what they want, even though you can't afford it. Maybe that makes you feel a sense of accomplishment or like a good mom or a good partner or a good wife or a good daughter.

There's this good girl mentality that so many of us have clung onto. And it comes down to this over giving that we do. We either feel too much or not enough. And actually, they're the same. There's always this this deeper root of why we over give and under give to our self.

To put this in practice, there's a few tips that I want to give you that you can do. And the most important one to start with is to find pleasure. Pleasure in yourself, in your life, asking yourself, “what is the next best loving thing that I can do for myself right now in this moment?” And maybe and if you're in a down place, maybe that's taking a bath, just taking three deep breaths.

 Sometimes we feel like we need to do a lot to accomplish something or to feel accomplished. But again, that's the ego. That's our self-worth saying, “you know, you're not worthy enough. You need to do more. You need to earn it. You need to earn love.” But when we when we feel into things, that's where our that's where we feel connected. That's where, you know, those archetypes of like the Mother Earth come into play. The wise woman. And that's who you are at your core. Because we're not the things we do. We need to tap into our feminine essence, that inner resource.

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